![]() This may stem from our need to gauge where our child stands and, for competitive parents, a need to feel validated. Or we’re compelled to ask the teacher how other students did compared to your child. Many times, we walk into a conference curious about how many kids in our child’s class got a particular grade. How do we have productive and honest dialogues at our next parent-teacher conference? Below I propose goals, questions, and strategies to make the most of your conference. Or worse, an unexpected comment could leave parents feeling blindsided and paranoid. As a result, parents may leave the meeting empty-handed and mildly dissatisfied. To mask discomfort, parents and teachers often rely on ritualistic pleasantries and surface-level recaps of the progress report. If parent-teacher conferences are an evaluation, no wonder all parties come to the table feeling raw and vulnerable. Inevitably, it’s also a time when parents and teachers size up each other to understand why the student is saying what they are and behaving the way they do-and in some cases, whether the stuff the student told about a teacher (or a parent) is true. It’s a time for parents and teachers to sync up on a student’s progress at school. The parent-teacher conference is an evaluation of everyone’s progress and expectations. The prep work leading up to the conference can leave teachers feeling frazzled and drained. When one session runs late, the train derails. ![]() ![]() In a single day, teachers meet with 15-20+ parents/caregivers for 10-20 minutes with no downtime. Having played a role on both ends, I believe conferences are a time of anticipation and strain for both parents and teachers. This formidable experience took place before I became an educator myself. Second irony: this was only a preschool conference! I felt inferior and reduced in her presence. Yet, it was the way that teacher had talked to me: the tone of voice, the dominating stare, and the anticipatory pause. Here’s the irony: my son was fine-he was not in trouble and was on track academically and socially. I had a hard time shaking off these feelings for weeks. I remember holding back my tears and walking out of the room feeling judged and diminished. Find out what lessons they are working on, and ask them about those lessons.My very first parent-teacher conference as a new parent was disheartening.
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